kaliban.org Sep 29 2003

by Gunnar on 29. September 2003 · 5 comments

Die Sexualität von Harry Potter

Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word wand with wang in the first Harry Potter Book. Let’s see the results…

A magic wang… this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

“Yes,” Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding…. Any second now, he might hear his mother again… but he shouldn’t think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn’t want to… or did he? Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang. Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls.

“Oh, move over,” Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry’s wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, ‘Alohomora!”

He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

“Get – off – me!” Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

(übernommen von bash.org)

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kaliban.org Sep 29 2003

by Gunnar on 29. September 2003 · 2 comments

Wer regelmäßig Signale aus dem All bekommt…

… darf hierhin surfen, da wird ihm geholfen. Für die meisten von uns dürfte es aber schon zu spät sein…

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